From the London Office

The Trump White House has been characterised by chaos and incompetence since its very first day. Since his election in November, actually. But judging things from afar, it was hard not to be candescently amused and titillated. Not since George W Bush had America looked so pointless and stupid, until 9/11 happened of course. And Bush was nowhere near as good fun as Trump.

Today, I awoke early. Was it the church bell tolling four? Possibly. But after years of politics and election reporting, I have developed a sixth sense. If I am awake at four, one of two things has happened: (1) I am sick, or (2) the Queen has died. I turned on the phone.

Trump Fires Comey. Watergate II (Again, The Return). Incompetent Comey Pays Price for Hillary Screw Up. Clinton Email Scandal Engulfs Comey. Comey Fired by Sessions On Advice of Minor Unknown Cameo.

Well, even Louise Mensch didn’t see that coming. And she was rebranded herself into a Trump Watcher extraordinaire, breaking many Trump-Russia stories before any of the American ‘journalists’ got a whiff in.

Rewind.

Trump fired Comey because he didn’t follow due process in investigating Hillary Clinton?

Could this be the same Trump who applauded Comey for meddling in the election, pouncing in with ‘big’ news that turned out to be nothing? The same Comey whom Hillary herself partly blames for losing her the election? So Trump is now protecting Hillary Clinton?!

Rubbish.

Trump is protecting Trump.

What we were not supposed to know, but of course we all do, is that the FBI is in the process of convening grand juries to hear evidence about the Trump-Russia connection. Which means charges will follow, and not just one or two. Tens of people in the Trump administration are being investigated in great detail. And not only by the FBI.

Even though Republicans are now shouting for Trump to be investigated and (presumably) sacked once he is found guilty, they rightly state that the loss of one person at the FBI will not derail the Trump-Russia investigation.

So why did Trump force Sessions to commission a memo to give him grounds to sack Comey?

As my friend said on the phone only yesterday (she was a she), with men, the most obvious explanation is always the correct one.

So the only plausible explanation for Trump firing Comey?

He simply doesn’t understand how American government works. And that, comrades, is the most scary conclusion anyone can draw against the man with his finger on the button.

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